Knife And Farce

Minutes ago, I decided to turn on the television. As any human being would ordinarily do when not compelled to view anything in particular, I began skimming through the channels at a canter, in order to find some remotely decent programming for possibly an hour or two. And do you know what befell my eyes? Yet another report relating to knife crime in the UK (particularly connected to London, as once again, this recent spate of well-publicised stabbings has been centralised around our nation’s capital). But there was something different about this report that sparked my attention instantaneously. Shall I proceed to tell you what this was? Very well.

It seems that the government believes it to be a “good idea” to force the perpetrators of knife crime into visiting their victims in whichever second-rate hospital they’ve been sent to get patched up. Whether I misheard what the journalist said – causing the specifics of the entire notion to be lost in a sea of anger and indignation at the idea in hand – is beyond me, and altogether possible. In fact, if the above is true, I see no reason to justify, in any circumstance, the passing-through of such a law. What would it entail? The soon-to-be convicts choosing to finish the job they set out to do, whilst the victim is helpless to prevent a further attack? I’m sorry, call me sceptical and all that, but I don’t really think giving the persons responsible for the injuries they have already inflicted a second bite at the cherry is going to solve the problem with deaths from knife-related incidents.

One thing is certain, however. I can best describe the government’s proposal to deter these people from carrying out violent attacks in a simple word: lunacy.

Is it so easy to forget that a lot of those liable are proud of their work? Heck, sending them to see victims is an extra chance to take a picture of their handiwork on their stolen camera phones. Or, at the very least, it gives them a plethora of new ideas on how to cut/slash/shank someone the next time they choose to do it. Apparently, according to some, stabbing someone can be seen as a work of art. Their prey is the canvas, their knife is the paintbrush.

The government’s wording is that “people caught carrying knives are to be sent to visit stabbing victims in hospital to show them the potential consequences”. I’m pretty sure any person who’s carrying a knife around with them knows what the consequences are when they use it. They are willingly carrying around weapons; weapons that are dematerialising the fabric that acts a security blanket of our society. Sooner or later, they are going to act with it, and by that point, it doesn’t matter why they’ve used it.

A Glaswegian male was stabbed 11 times at the T in the park music festival, on Sunday morning. Fortunately, he survived, and is now recovering in hospital. Why was this man stabbed? Because he chose to help out his female friend, who had been accosted by two male strangers. Did this man get much press attention? No. He’s still alive. But I digress. Perhaps we should first look at the underlying explanation for why so many people are keeping knives on their person. It can’t all be for “self-defence”.

In all, do you honestly believe the government’s “tough” new regime is going to work wonders?